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Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"--Dustin Hoffman"I asked my wife 'On a scale from one to ten, how do you rate me as a lover?' She said 'You know I'm no good at fractions'".--Rodney Dangerfield"I told my girlfriend that unless she expressed her feelings and told me what she liked, I wouldn't be able to please her. So she said 'Get off me'".--Garry Shandling"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked!'"--Jerry Seinfeld"In my sex fantasy, nobody ever loves me for my mind".--Nora Ephron"My wife likes to talk to me during sex. In fact, the other day she called me from a motel".--Scotty Record"My sex life is very bad. If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all".--Henny Youngman"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis and only enough blood to run one at a time".--Robin. They moved on to a few sessions of cyber sex, where he watched her masturbate, and she watched him. This worked for them for a time. Four or five months had gone by when during one night's conversation, she brought up that she wanted to meet him. She explained that she had some vacation saved up, and one of her friends had a house on the beach. They would meet at a neutral location, of course. There was always the possibility that neither was who they appeared to be, but she really wanted to meet him. They set up a date, a time, and a place. He would have to fly, and planned on renting a car. The vacation house was only a few hours from where she was.Greg went shopping, every day, for a week before his vacation, trying to pick out the perfect outfit. He didn't want to look like an old man trying to look young, but he wanted to look good. His vacation was scheduled, his flight was booked and he had more new clothes than he'd bought in three years. He packed his bags, at least three.
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